New additions are being placed at the beginning of their respective sections.
If you see a photo that looks interesting, click on the thumbnail for an enlarged picture, then use the "Back" button on your browser to return to this page.
I shouldn't really make fun of the Japanese when they try to use English, so before you read any further, I would like to emphasise that I'm not laughing at individuals' efforts to make themselves understood. Believe me, I know how hard it is to communicate in a foreign language!
However, everything on this page is already on public display; it's not just one poor person trying to express themselves. Most native English speakers can't help finding it amusing that companies actually publish things like this and put them on display in shops without getting a native speaker to check over them first.
Japlish is the "almost-English" that you frequently see plastered all over stationery, clothing, accessories and all sorts of other things in Japan. The words are English - in most cases - but they're usually fairly meaningless and often downright nonsensical. (French is becoming increasingly popular now too, but I'm not qualified to judge its ridiculousness!)
Following my trip to China (March/April 2000), I have also added a page showing some examples of the "Chinglish" that I came across.
Here are a few Japlish examples from my experience...
Seen on stationery:
I wish you to taste this roman.
A dream makes evolution.
Let's enjoy your life. Sometimes you can do it only with lovely color.
A typical example of the overuse of "let's" that the Japanese are so fond of.
We have a strong faith that most customers are moved by our goods. For there is a heartful mind in it.
You can dance the dream
with your body on
(Just in case you thought you might be expected to take it off...)
Update: I've learned that this is actually a line from a Kate Bush song, "The Red Shoes", so since the source is actually a native English speaker I suppose it doesn't really qualify as Japlish!
Could you show me the way to the sweet flake land
Silent whisper of sweet flowers in the floral garden
We little cheery dream. Do you like? I am cheeful of cherry.
Choose from 3 channels!
Let's go into another digital space.
We can make mach noise.
Here is our designated seats.
Come on, together!
LIKE NEWLY BORN BABY AS YOU LIKE!
I'm a favorite
of this circus
I'm very happy
in this showtimes
Let's get happiness
My heart's bouching like a rubber ball.
Sounds like a nasty affliction!
Seen in several places - not only on writing paper but also on a lot of Shiga Bank's promotional items! It often seems that the people who write this stuff can't find a word that sounds quite right (to them) so they make one up; other examples, to be found elsewhere in this collection, are "potentiality" and "refreshness".
As I come closee to a dream, my heart throbs.
Let's go out in a dreamy mood.
This flower I once dreamed of is full of hopes.
This Sunday morning, time looks to flow especially more slowly than usual.
Cards and postcards
Floated on the water
This form visited at the time of sleep, with one drop of a sweet tear, one day decaying into the soil.
European dogs are living freely.
It is open and Elegantly.
Many cats are doing usual life
In the beautiful scenery and the streets.
We can see that one part.
What a beautiful view! The good day of such weather wants to relax under the sun. Let's spend joyful time. I want to laugh with the friends very much.
It is the memorial day when you were born.
"I like your smile very much."
"Today is a wonderful day."
"You are a very kind friend."
"Thank you for encouraging always me."
The bits in quotation marks were shown as speech bubbles coming from dolphins.
I always think of your thing
A GIRL MOVE
IS A WILD
A It has some bags, but it changes in some rooms when it is broken in two.
B A monkey likes it very much. We will slip when it steps on the skin of it.
The picture for "A" was a citrus fruit of some kind, and "B" (as you might have guessed) was a bunch of bananas.
When anyone is living, there are various happenings. A happy thing. A sad thing. A hard day comes in the time. But, anyone is living very hard.
I'll sticky about my favorite things.
Very Wonderfully and more pleasantly.
FUNNY TOWN'S THEATER
STARRING FUNKY FANNY
This one was so unbelievable that I had to buy the birthday card it was on!
"Hello, is my voice hearable?"
"Yes, it is well hearable."
"Let's go to the movie on Sunday."
"All right. Let's do lunch together, after that. It is aware of wonderful restaurant."
The picture showed two people talking to each other into tin cans connected by a piece of string.
What do you do on Sunday if you can ride a cloud? A slow hour passes while having a loose wind have had blown. By the way, please teach it somewhere.
on your marriage
Happy Wedding Box
What camera do you like, though being variously for a camera also?
This button was made in France in 1960s. For a button, there are many kinds by a material, color, shape. What button is a favorite button of you?
Now it's everyday man's job to
LOOK LIKE GOOD NEWS!
What can a believe in?
Drifting story of a awkward bear and pretty penguins.
DON'T ABANDON HOPES, THERE IS THE DENOUEMENT.
Hey, here, here we are!!
And today, here comes joyful three. Getting be global sea trotters, they fuss about noisily. But they are our happy ANI-MATE.
We're a purely couple and we believe each other so much.
YOU'LD BETTER PLAY MUCH WIDE AND LIGHT PLACE
SHADY SPOT ISN'T GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH
My friends they are alway
smile face so happy.
Nature relaxes our eyes and mind.
Kyokuto Note Co., Ltd. wins Popularity to use smooth and the most harmless paper of the quality "Eye Soft Green."
Only those who challenge can life a checkered
HAPPY DAYS OF YOUNG SHEEP
I'm a sheep, young handsome sheep.
My parents, sisters, brothers and my girl friends are near here. Because we are the No1 big family in a world.
They say every sheep look like me very much. But look at them carefully. Their faces are a little bit difference. So I'm a lonesome sheep. Very lonesome.
Would you date with me?
The notebook having horizontal ruled line and being able to fold up is the best for arranging sentences.
On an exercise book and two different notebooks, none which looked particularly foldable to me.
Scotch & Blue Jeans
Put on jeans, have a Coke, listen the Beetles and see James Dean. With loving them, we have grown up.
sex, ecstasy and the psychedelic drugs
On several stationery items in a 100 yen shop. Hardly any of the people using this stuff would have had the slightest inkling of what they were promoting!
Let's take sometimes memories of leave a photograph.
On a photo envelope.
SEE THIS FLOWER
We're having a spell of mind weather.
On a photo album.
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF GERMANY
Display your ability substantially and you should find the way opening . Let's keep straight on after struggling.
On a pencil case.
THE VICTORY IS YOURS
Players having various personailty is running on the field whenver we imagine spirit and technique of a unknown super star we have much expectation. A new legend will be made by those professional players movement.
Also on a pencil case.
WILD STRAW BERRY COLONE
WILD STRAW BERRY COLONE IS PRITTEY!!
BRAND NEW DIMENSIONS.
On a sticker.
Children has a pleasant smile
with wonderful dreams filling their pockets.
On a photo album
Be sticky about nature
I touched a tiny nature.
It's nature that our life needs.
Here is beautiful flowers.
On an address book and cash book
This notebook is excellent quality and royal to learn.
Put pen to this paper.
Royal to learn??
I live cheerful life. We are enjoying our pleasant life with vigor.
HELLO! MY FRIEND
How won about worlds...!
Another notebook - one of a series, but the others weren't quite this bad.
CLEAR FILE, put light and superb filing aid, which perfectly matches your life style.
Let this subtle and foppish CLEAR FILE assist you become a filing expert!
CLEAR FILE, an invaluable partner to your desk work.Keep it on your desk.
Subtle and foppish?
It was very long time ago to meet, you here. Since then, even many years passed, the music we had listened in those days is being played in my mind all the time...
On a photo album
Creating memories and dreams.
I want to see strange people in south and north countries.
Beautiful ripples on your life.
The dream has grown up a size larger than before.
Another photo album
It's special material to your daily life.
free cash book
for use money with thrift
Seen on what was presumably a cashbook.
Seen on clothing and accessories:
Young man long to go West Coast. And they think that they want stay at the sea side hotel of Song fame, if they can manage it.
On a backpack.
All over a bag.
will you play?
Hi life. Hi lime. Hi luz.
On a T-shirt.
BEING THE HAPPINEST IN OUR LIVES
LEARNING TO LIKE YOURSELE
On a sweatshirt.
Becouse there was a longing by common sense
On a padded bag. The first word is German, though I'm not sure whether it's actually a real word ("einsamkeit" means loneliness or solitude, so I suppose "zweisamkeit" refers to two people together). Anyway, there's no excuse for the second part.
have a royal time.
On a bag.
Let's go where You've never been
Find your stay place.
You will find your possibility, if you try it what your new things
On a pyjama top.
THIS SHOES IS BEST FITTING
On a pair of shoes. Yes, actually on the top of each shoe, there for all to read.
The stillness of now
Flows eternally within our
chrysalis dream reality
On a T-shirt.
have a good reputation socks
On the packaging of a pair of white "loose socks" as favoured by high school girls all over Japan. Several girls in this picture are wearing them. (They get the socks to stay up by actually gluing them to their legs - always at mid-calf level - using Pritt Stick or similar glue!)
We Keep basic style in clothing and add a touch of the latese fashion. Making best use of good infomation.
On a small nylon duffle bag. Their "good infomation" on "latese fashion" clearly didn't come from someone who could spell!
The latest style
Now the fabulous goods is styled for the fashion of it. Take a pair to the streets.
On a glossy carrier bag.
always and anyway
I want to be
This was on a small portfolio case carried by a guy on the train who kept falling asleep on my shoulder. Tortoise club - quick response???
Men's Under Wear
We'll advise you about your "stickiness" about your daily life.
Personally, I'd be more inclined to ask my doctor...
Put one's heart
It's rich in tradition sports and most popular sports in English
On a shopping bag, with a picture of a polo player on horseback. (Polo motifs seem to be very popular in Japan for some reason.)
I makes a point of walking every morning. I see much of a kitten then.
On a bag. Sounds as if someone has been removing body parts from the kitten in question!
EIGHT SHIP HERE!
On a T-shirt.
WE ARE SUPER HERO
FOR 21 TH CENTURY
On a baseball cap.
The Bears is fond of English
On a pair of girls' knickers.
if you come
On a sweatshirt.
I am an enjoy of the sea.
Enjoy the marine sports.
On a child's jacket.
I am zzz
On the back of a jacket.
"TU-KA" means smooth and quick communication in-between.
"TU-KA" is our strong desire.
On a bag.TU-KA is a brand of mobile phone.
BASIC AND EXCITING
Refreshed and foppish sense and comfortable and flesh styles will catch you who belong to city-groups
On the label of a cardigan.
This was plastered across the front of a woman's T-shirt in big letters. She may have deliberately been making a statement, but I doubt it....
We love tiny nature
This was on somebody's shopping bag. There was more to it, but unfortunately I can't remember what the rest said.
Use prppose on inner fearny of sotiofoction to you
Written down the front of a blouse/T-shirt. I'm not sure that this one even qualifies as Japlish!
It's personal miscellaneous goods a new.
On the label attached to a bag.
Standing to the ovation for myself.
You are luck if you are luck
thinking what you think
we can see things that hate and heart
if you change another one
please not changed sold out man or woman
they are bores............
On a T-shirt.
Fall coming rain He is trembing for a cold and loneliness While grasping and closing a cold can coffee I defend a wet body. I wish a good luck and success of back all persons who take from my heart for this cross...
Written in Gothic script on a T-shirt.